Some things I have discovered over the last few – boring – days:

If you put “how to be pretentious” into google, it can’t tell you how.
If you watch Paramount Comedy all day it starts to repeat itself.
If you tell people how dull it is to have so much time off work, they don’t appreciate it.
Daytime TV sucks.
Reading books is more appealing when you don’t have the time.
Su Doku is just like Maths homework.
There are no good pictures of Anthony and Cleopatra on the web.
Wedding magazines are full of very expensive, not so pretty, dresses.
I am incapable – not of remembering birthdays – but of sending presents.
Detective shows, pathology shows, murder mystery shows, are all predictable.
Planning lessons during the summer isn’t as fun as stressing about them the night before.
If you leave the back door open long enough, the cat comes in to keep you company.